why (not) me?
Updated: Apr 24
At the risk of allowing this disease to define me as a person, I have something else to say about it. Believe me, I am as sick of this topic as you are and this may be the last blog post I write on it. I say "may" because I am not sure I am absolutely done with it, and the talking about it, although I want to be.
Here are the qualities that make me well-equipped to deal with the ins and outs I have to face every day. I know, it seems like I am tooting my own horn - or worse, feeling sorry for myself. There are certainly those days, even hours, that are more difficult than others, and I am not always up for confronting this challenge. But there are some things that make it manageable.
I am, and have always been, eternally optimistic. It's in my blood, I think. Some might say I am naïve or unrealistic. My reality is seeing the positive side to everything, and I think reality can be subjective. So my reality is THE reality.
My mother often quotes me this:
Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.
So, it seems I get my optimism from her. (My mother, not Emily – although, Emily apparently has her share of it).
When you drop every single thing you pick up, take 20 minutes to put your underwear on, and wheel yourself around by grabbing onto the woodwork because it seems faster, you need something like patience to keep yourself sane. Have you ever seen that commercial with the sloth playing Pictionary? Yeah. I’m the sloth.
Sense of humor
I cannot stress how vitally important it is to be able to laugh at yourself - especially when it seems like there is nothing to laugh at. Life is funny. YOU are funny. Ridiculous, even. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can? Honestly, I don't know how people go through their days without breaking up every once in a while. I think people take themselves way too seriously.
Without these things, I imagine this disease would be hell. I immerse myself in the small moments of happiness, when I can. Feelings are fleeting, so I have to relish those happy moments, as if they are all I have, because they truly are. It’s all any of us have. Right in front of us.